Funny SMS Text Messages and Jokes Collection

funny sms jokes,funny sms, funny text messages, funny jokes

Animal SMS

Funny sms text messages about Animals, Animal Jokes, Animal Urdu SMS Jokes, Funny Hindi Animal Jokes, Jokes about Animals in Urdu, Punjabi, Hindi and English.

Panda Eats Shoots

FacebookTwitterGoogle+Share

A panda bear walks into a restaurant. He orders the special and eats it.
After eating, he pulls out a pistol, kills the waiter and starts to walk out the door.

The owner of the restaurant says, “Hey, what are you doing? You come in here,
you kill my waiter and walk away without saying a word. I don’t understand.”

The panda says, “Look it up in the dictionary,” and walks out of the door.

So the owner gets out a dictionary and looks under the heading “Panda”. It reads:
“Panda black and white animal; lives in central China; eats shoots and leaves.”


Monkey Smells But….

A man was walking down the street with a baby ape in his arms when a friend stopped him

and asked what he was doing with the chimpanzee.

“I just bought this ape as a pet. Actually We have no children; so he’s going to live with us just like one of the family.

He’ll eat at the same table with us. He’ll even sleep in the same bed with me and my wife.”

“But what about the smell?” the friend asked.

“Oh, he’ll just have to get used to it, the same way I did.”

Monkey Smells But….
3(60%) 1 votes

Chor Do Nasha

Ek Cheeta Cigarette ka sutta lagane hi wala tha ki achanak ek chuha wahan aya aur bola

bhai chor do nasha, ao mere sath,dekho ye jungle kitna khubsurt hai.

Cheeta choohe k sath chal dia
Aage 1 hathi cocaine pi rha tha, chooha
Phir bola,

bhai chor do nasha,ao mere sath,dekho ye jungle kitna khubsurt hai.

Hathi b sth chal dia

Age sher whisky pene ki tyari kr rha tha,choohe ne use b woi kaha

Sher ne glas side pr rakha aur chohe ko 5-6 thappar mare

Hathi bola are kyu mar rahe ho is bechare ko?

Sher bola, Is kamine ne pichli bar b afeem kha kar mujhe 3 ghante jungle me aise hi ghumaya tha…….


before marriage

A mouse was dancing and enjoying in a lion’s wedding. An elephant was surprised to see this and asked: “Hey buddy why are you dancing and enjoying so much?”

mouse continued dancing and replied calmly: “you must not know that i was also a lion before marriage.”…:P:P:P

before marriage
2(40%) 1 votes

Mother Wolf

The wolf howls in the darkness,
She lets the wind carry her cries.
Her silhouette on a hilltop,
The moon reflected in her eyes.
The agony she carries, the pain.
At her feet, the lifeless cub she bore.
In the animal kingdom it’s the circle of life,
Nothing less and nothing more.
The moon casts down its sympathy,
As it blankets around her rabid soul.
Nature defenseless against man,
An innocent life that white man stole.
As her howl travels,
The hunter stops dead still.
For the hunted often holds revenge,
An angry mother, ready to kill.
Her silhouette no longer rests under the moon,
It runs through the old forest trees.
Her legs swift, much faster than the hunter.
His cries carry through the breeze.

Mother Wolf
5(100%) 8 votes

Ant and Elephant

An ant and an elephant got married, despite the best advice of their friends.

After the first night of honeymoon, the elephant suffered a heart attack and died.

“It’s so bad.,” said the ant, “One night of emotions, and now I get to spend the rest of my life digging a  grave.”

Ant and Elephant
2.75(55%) 4 votes

Page 1 of 212
Funny SMS Text Messages and Jokes Collection © 2015